Family Members and Caregivers: it’s all about teamwork!
When someone is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, not only does their life change, but so does the family members’ lives.
Today is the last day of Alzheimer’s Awareness month, but every day more older adults are diagnosed with this disease. With this, a large number of family members suddenly become unpaid and underqualified caregivers. There is help for all stages, but let us start from the beginning…
What is Alzheimer’s Disease?
Alzheimer’s disease is a degenerative brain disease and the most common form of dementia. Dementia is not a specific disease. It’s an overall term that describes a group of symptoms. (Alzheimer’s Association)
Currently 5.8 million Americans 65 and older are living with Alzheimer’s and other Dementias. By 2050 that number will rise to 13.8 million people.
So, what are the signs of Alzheimer’s?
- Memory loss that disrupt daily life – forgetting recently learned information.
- Unable to solve simple problems – following step by step directions or instructions
- Difficulty completing familiar tasks – getting lost on a drive to the grocery store
- Confusion with time and place – forget the date or season they are currently in
- Trouble understanding visual images and spatial relationships – depth perception is off when walking up and down steps
- New problems with words in speaking or writing – forgetting the name of a hairbrush or a watch
- Misplacing things and unable to retrace steps – forgot which room they were just came from
- Decreased or poor judgment – not grooming or keeping themselves clean
- Withdrawal from work and social activities – just stops attending things regularly
- Changes in mood or personality – becomes paranoid, thinks people are stealing from them if they cannot find the item
If you or your loved one is showing some signs…
The Alzheimer’s Association has some wonderful conversation starters:
- I’ve noticed [blank] in myself, and I’m concerned. Have you noticed anything about me that worries you?
- I’ve noticed [blank] in you, and I’m concerned. Have you noticed it? Are you worried?
- How have you been feeling lately? You haven’t seemed like yourself.
- I noticed you [specific example], and it worried me. Has anything else like that happened?
Once the conversation has started…
You may have to have several conversations, but convincing yourself or your loved one of seeing a doctor as soon as possible is your main goal.
Some suggested phrases to approach this are:
- I think it would give me peace of mind to see a doctor and find out what’s going on. Would you be willing to go with me for support?
- There are lots of things that could be causing these changes, and dementia may or may not be one of them. Let’s see if the doctor can help us figure out what’s going on.
- The sooner we know what’s causing these problems, the sooner we can address them.
- I think it would give us both peace of mind if we talked with a doctor.
Moving forward as family members and caregivers–>
The hardest part that I personally have witnessed over the years is the initial diagnosis. It is a lot to take in, but doing it as a team (caregiver and diagnosed loved one) is so very important. Maintaining the respect of the patient eases a lot of stress on them when they are facing a drastic cognitive change.
Once someone knows what is going on with their mind and body, the resources are numerous and there are many support groups and organizations to help guide you.
If I could give one piece of advice to family members and caregivers of Alzheimer’s patients…
First and foremost remember that they are an adult and they are aware of being an adult throughout the progression of the disease-treat them accordingly. Respect them, their wishes, desires, needs, and wants. (Even when a baby doll is the only thing that comforts them at times.)
(Alzheimer’s Association, November, 2020)
